The Talks: Part 4--Being a Mother

Hope everyone had a great weekend and got to celebrate the wonderful fathers in your life.  This "talk" is more of an outline of how to write your own "Being a Mother" talk.  These are usually very personal talks about the struggles and joys of motherhood, however there are some main point that we always touch on.  Since so much of my "being a mother" talk has already been covered in other posts, I thought I would present this as a "how-to" instead.

In today's society, motherhood has lost it's esteem.  Sure Hallmark charges $6-8 for a Mother's Day card and Zales wants you to buy your mother diamonds, but that is just commercialization.  The vocation of motherhood is not revered like it once was.  However, being a mother is the greatest job that needs to be done, and there are many types of mothers.  Mothering is a demanding love, but in truth would we have it any other way?  My husband has a shirt that he wears every Father's Day, it says "Fatherhood: The Toughest Job You'll Ever Love."  And so it is with motherhood as well, even more so when you think of pregnancy, delivery, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, and homeschooling. 

The point of this talk is two-fold, first we want the girls to understand the beauty and grace of being a mother, how it is a calling and a blessing.  Also, we want them to understand that mothers give all of themselves to their children and while they do not always allow children to do exactly what they want, they are always doing what is best.  It is important for the girls to realize how hard the mothers are working to invest in their children's futures.

Main points to be addressed:

1.  Discuss your own journey of motherhood, the highs and lows, the anticipation and disappointments in pregnancies, the joys and struggles.  Introduce your family and recount briefly the story of each of your children's pregnancies and birth.  It is important to make this a real talk, it should not be all hearts and roses in the hope that the girls will want to have a fairy tale family.  You need to be real, but you also need to remember that they are little girls so keep any talk of difficult labor or horrors of delivery out.  Let them see how much you love being a mom, but how hard it is even though you love it so.

2.  Discuss the different types of motherhood.  We always discuss the beauty of adoption, how one mother out of sacrificial love gives up a baby she cherishes but can not care for, and another mother out of love welcomes this new baby into her home and heart.  We discuss spiritual motherhood like Mother Seton, Mother Cabrini, Mother Teresa, and Mother Angelica, women who give their lives to serving God through meeting the needs of the world's children.  This past talk we also included grand-mothering.

3.  It is always nice, especially if you have many girls that do not know you well, to share baby pictures of your children.  Who doesn't love baby pictures?  I usually made up a power point presentation, but if you have a small group, you could even just pass around photo frames.

4.  Include some talk about how much your children were loved long before they were born, how they are gifts from God.  Remind the girls that they were knit together and designed by God and given to their mothers, and they carry with them a piece of God's love that He placed within them the moment they were created--their immortal soul.

5.  Lastly, stress the importance of mothers and how their service in the home helps the entire world.  Where would he world be without people like Thomas Edison, St. John Paul II, Abraham Lincoln, St Augustine, Saint Therese and so on.  All of them were loved by their mothers and taught the beauty of God long before they were great personalities on the world stage.  Mothering makes a difference.  Also, discuss the difference between vocation and profession and how much more important it is to find your Godly vocation.

“All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” —Abraham Lincoln

“I remember my mother’s prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.” —Abraham Lincoln

“My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her.” —George Washington

“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” ―Washington Irving

“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” —Robert Browning

  “[A] mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled.” —Emily Dickinson

 “A mother’s arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them.” —Victor Hugo

source

Even on the cross, Christ remembered and cared for His mother and His mother cared for Him.

Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, “Dear woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home